And now I wanted to share my story. When I was in high school, some boys thought it would be funny to call me a whore, slut, harlot (we were studying Chaucer and the 1200s that year)–I hadn’t even kissed anyone yet. I ignored it at first because I knew they were just being stupid. My friends thought it was funny because of my inexperience and told me I shouldn’t care. I didn’t. For a while. But one day, I just broke down crying because it was too much. They stopped, and I let the incidents pass. A few years later, I started college. I was excited to start fresh with new kids who didn’t know me or my small town. I met great people, went to some parties, kissed a few boys at said parties. Apparently, this last thing gave people new ammo. I heard from friends that people from back home had asked them if it was true that I had become easy and a slut. My friends found the whole thing amusing because “it isn’t true, so who cares?” They were only words, right? Why should it matter? But it did. Eventually, other things proved more exciting to gossip about, and eventually, I put all of that to the back of my mind.

In the last few years, however, with bullying–especially digital–on the rise, I thought about this stuff again. I thought about how lucky I was that this was 1990s and not 2011. How lucky I was that the words disappeared after they were uttered instead of living forever in cyberspace or people’s phones. Of traveling by phone or mouth from person to person, instead of to hundreds or more with just one click. That’s sobering, isn’t it? If I was a teen now, all of the above would have been much worse. There would not just be rumors of me kissing boys at parties, there would be photos as “proof” spreading like wildfire, posted on people’s FB pages.

My next novel is called PIECES OF US and will be published by Flux in March, and my experiences and those of other teens were the inspirations. In it, one of the main characters–Katie– is told to perform sexual acts or risk the release of another damning video. Bullies bank on victims’ fears, rely on the victims not telling, not fighting back. Victims think they can’t. They think they CAN’T tell anyone or say no. Or they think they are left without a choice–fight back or have a video/text/sexy pic exposed. It doesn’t have to be either or. There is another MC in the book–Alex. He is a misogynistic, crass, abuser. He is also Katie’s boyfriend. He is the type of guy who puts virgins on a pedestal, who defines worth by what a girl will or will not do. He abuses Katie and she keeps going back to him because she feels she deserves it. He was hard to write, and from what readers said, equally hard to read. So why did I do it? Because there ARE guys like that. I’ve known guys like that. Many women have known guys like that. It is important they don’t stay hidden. It is important people can recognize them and point them out. It is important they are fought.

It is a different world today than in the ’90s, but people are not all that different. Victims need support and need to know people will listen. That no amount of bullying is ok. That nothing is too small. If it hurts you, it’s not OK.

“Post pictures, songs, movie clips, poems, or novel excerpts that make you feel. Feel what, you ask? Feel anything. Happy. Sad. Angry. Nostalgic. Hopeful. Hopeless. Jealous. Joyful.

I have read in several different places that YA novelist John Green said of his latest novel, The Fault In Our Stars that he wants to make his readers “Feel All The Things.” I would love that someone could go through this blog chain and through what we all choose to post have that same Feel All The Things feeling.”

Before I post, I want to say I completely agree with Green. I would say most–if not all–writers do. I’ve had some issues (uh, like needer a thicker skin issues) with some reviews for PIECES OF US, my YA novel that’s coming out in March. Seems like those who like it, REALLY like it, and those who hate it, uh, they REALLY (and I mean REALLY) hate it. So after I penned yet another e-mail to two of my close friends about this, they both wrote back the same thing. “You want this. You’re making people react. You’re really making them feel.” And isn’t that what I wanted? It says something when people react.

Here are some pics that make me feel happy and maybe you.

How cute is this loris? It looks a little scared and makes me want to hold him.

This is my kid (4) dressed up as Wolverine and me dressed up as Batgirl. I love the pic of him because his imagination is awesome and he LOVES dressing up as superheroes, pirates, you name it. And the pic of me? Well, it makes me happy because it was fun doing it and the way my little guy looked at me (like I was all kinds of awesome and amazing) makes me want to wear this for him all the time.

The Breakfast Club is one of my favorite movies ever and the song from it rocks.

The Breakfast Club on YouTube

I loved the ’80s and nineties too. So here are some ’90s trends too. Ah, nostalgia.

The Nineties on YouTube

That’s all for now…. For more emotional stuff check out Tere’s post before mine and Jon’s post next.

“Imagine the home(s) where you grew up, and start drawing a floor plan. As you draw, memories will surface. Grab onto one of those memories and tell us a story.”

When I was in my late twenties, my parents sold the house I spent most of my life in and moved to another one in the same town. Shortly after, my husband and I bought a house in this town as well (my sis and her family live here too and I guess all of us can’t stay away from each other), and it’s a few blocks away from my childhood home. While I haven’t been inside it since my parents sold it, I pass it often on walks and show my son the outside of the house his mommy grew up in. The new owners changed the siding and put a garden in the back, and removed the rose bushes–one of my favorite things about this house–from the front, but I still think of it as mine. And while I’m sure there are changes inside as well, in my memory, it will always look as I remember it. Join me on a tour….

The backyard has a deck overlooking the grass, trees, and flowers. I practiced my cheerleading cartwheels on that grass. At my sweet sixteen, two of my friends shared their first kisses with boys they liked behind the trees on that grass. Beyond the fence surrounding the backyard is the bike path I used to walk on my way home from junior high and high school. On that bike path, I first learned to ride a two-wheeler. Past the bike path is my elementary school and the most amazing grassy hill. For years, we went sledding on that hill. Now, teens go snowboarding, and I took my now four year old on that double hill for his first sledding experience. He was much braver than me, moving his sled to every possible ramp and bump.

Ready to go back inside? The first floor has my older sister’s room. The wallpaper has stars, and the bed, while not the sturdiest one in the world always welcomed me whenever I was scared to sleep on my own. Upstairs, was my parents room, and the powder room. I was not into make-up, but that room was amazing. It had lights around the mirror like a movie star’s and I spent many hours twirling around on the spinny chair and checking out that mirror. No photos, please. Attached to the powder room is my bedroom. It was an addition to the house, and I had my first sleepover (6th grade) there. The carpet was baby blue, and I had my own bathroom. And for my 18th birthday, one of my best friends stopped by while I was at work and left roses on my bed. He was the first boy to ever give me roses. Before we go back downstairs, take a look out the window to the trees outside. In the fall, the colors of the leaves look so pretty.

Let’s pass the kitchen on the way out. If my grandma is there, there is a plate of homemade sugar cinnamon cookies by the stove. Grab one or two or three. Come again, and don’t forget to check out the chalk drawings on the sidewalk outside. Today it’s a hopscotch board.

Thanks for joining me today. If you didn’t visit Tere’s house yet, please go there, and then take a tour of the rest of the chain if you missed it.

“So here’s my topic: What conditions do you need to get your best writing done? Closed door, crowded coffee house? Computer or notebook? Can you just sit down to write, or do you need to wait for the time to be right?”

When I was in high school, I picked up my journal when angst hit. Friend troubles, parent issues, boy heartbreak–my journal was my go to place for poetry or short stories (I was never the write down bare thoughts kind of girl; all had to be said through poems or a story). I also never just wrote anywhere. In those down moments, I’d go to my room, close the door, turn out all lights except for a reading light, wrap myself in blankets and write. My family knew not to bother me (but they did anyway). Sometimes, I’d be there for hours, and when I was done, while I never felt better immediately, it usually sparked something within that eventually got me out of my funk.

These days, I can’t do that. I have a husband and a four-year-old and neither would be thrilled if I just picked up and went to write in my room because the mood struck me. Too bad. So I have to plan. I write when my son is in school or if I arrange for a day ahead of time with hubby so he knows he’s on duty. And deadlines are great because they motivate me. With the schedule above, I try hard to produce when I have the set time, but my brain wanders and I can’t always focus. When I have a deadline, I always focus, usually because I have consecutive days where I write.

I did start carrying a notebook with me, though, and when a thought strikes (like when I’m waiting for my son to be done with gymnastics or if his pre-k is running late or Hubby is driving us somewhere) I write it down immediately. Writing by hand has also cleared my head when I’ve been stumped.

But what would I really love? The best way I can perform if given the choice? A weekend writing retreat. I LOVE these and it’s been so so long. It doesn’t have to be formal. Usually, it’s just a friend or two getting together at a hotel or shore house to write, write, write. I want another so badly. Maybe I’ll plan for one soon….

How about you? Share your ideal writing situation then check out Shaun’s post from yesterday.

This is the month in creating writing goals and making big accomplishments. What is your greatest accomplishment — in writing, your life or perhaps something incidental that had a big effect on you?

For once, I didn’t have to think before coming up with answer. Hands down, my son is my biggest accomplishment. He turned four in July, and teaches me things daily. He has a terrific sense of humor, is very silly, focused, smart, athletic (yep, don’t think he got that from either me or my husband), kind, persistent, and a host of other things. Before I had him, my main goal was getting published. Succeeding as a writer is something that is still very important to me, but being there for my little guy, guiding him, letting him teach me, is EVERYTHING. And, because of him, my professional successes gain new meaning. I want him to know he can accomplish anything he desires as long as he works at it. I want him to know he doesn’t have to settle for one thing–he can be so many things. Right now, he wants to be a construction worker, fireman, policeman, landscaper, ambulance worker, and most recently a cowboy. I’m sure tomorrow there will be a new profession added to the list. Why not?

As for me, I tell him I’m a mommy, a writer, a teacher. I started adjuncting at a college this fall, something I always wanted to do. My first YA came out in Nov. 2010. My next YA will be out in March. He’s been to bookstores with me and has gotten excited when he saw my book on a shelf. And I’m excited too. But not just because the book is there, but because my little man thinks it’s awesome, and HE’S proud of ME. And that makes me feel more accomplished than anything.

Share your biggest accomplishment, and then check out Tere’s post from yesterday and Shaun’s post tomorrow.

“Who is your favorite monster?”

I always liked watching scary movies, but can’t say I loved those monsters. But the monster who always creeped me out was The Rack from Buffy. That’s the dude who got Willow hooked on drugs. What freaked me out about him was that he was real as opposed to monster. Yes, he existed in some different realm, in an area that moved constantly and only those who needed the “magic” could find him, but he looked human. And, he was symbolic of a drug dealer. I always found “monsters” who could exist in our world far scarier than those like Freddy or Jason.

Want more creepy? Check out Tere’s fave monster here and tune into Shaun’s spooky pick tomorrow.

“Do you work with critique partners? How did you find your crit pals, and what influence have they had on your work?”

Like others on this blog chain, I had mixed experience with crit partners and critique groups. There were those group members who balked at any feedback you gave them, but were free with providing COPIOUS feedback on your work (a lot of which was irrelevant–”Really? You’re having them eat THAT for breakfast?”). Then, there were group members who only came to group to chat–which would be fine if we were getting coffee or just hanging, but not in a situation where I was trying to improve my work. Then, I had those crit partners who critiqued everything based on Reader-Response Theory (meaning, their critiques consisted of commentary of how the piece related to their lives: “Shut up! I love Donuts for dinner too!”). And, of course, there were the crit partners who only wanted to tell you everything that was wrong with your piece, but not provide hints on how to fix or even expand upon their comments (e.g. “Confusing”, “Don’t like” “Sucks”). And, yet, I wanted to keep looking for someone who I could connect with. Where’s the Match.com equivalent for writers?? You know I’m on to something here….

And then I found out my first novel, INCONVENIENT, was getting published. My agent mentioned a group called the Tenners and the rest is history. Well, sort of. A few times, I complained about how I really wanted a crit partner, what could I do to find a crit partner, doesn’t anyone else out there want a crit partner too? Bueller? Bueller? Anyone?

At this point, Shaun Hutchinson sent out an e-mail (he probably got tired of hearing me whine), saying he was interested in starting a crit group and was anyone else on board. Me! Me! A few others wrote back too, but the idea of the group kind of fizzled. BUT, it connected me and Shaun, and he’s been my crit partner and someone I consider one of my close friends since (I think it’s been 1.5 years now? More?). Shaun has read numerous drafts of various manuscripts. He has given me amazing feedback on my new novel, PIECES OF US (out March 2012), and he’s been there to cheer me up when I’m feeling down or just listen or commiserate or find new ways to say “Wow, this writing thing sucks sometimes” (yes, there ARE many ways to say that. Really.). Having Shaun in my life as a friend and crit partner has been the best thing that has come out of this whole publishing thing. And I love reading his work too. Watching both our writing styles evolve has been so great, and I always look forward to talking with him about writing and other things. In fact, we’re sooo overdue for Skyping…

My other crit partner is my close friend Vinessa. Vinessa is a writer too and we met in a writing class 8 years ago. While we both put aside the books we were working on years ago, meeting each other was totally worth all the money spent on that class. Vinessa not only provides amazing feedback and catches thematic and grammatical things I miss in my work, but she and I are also very much alike. She understands how something writing related can affect other aspects of my life and how an issue not writing related at all can somehow turn into me going off about my writing career. She also has read a zillion drafts of INCONVENIENT, and while the thought of me reading another chapter for the umpteenth time made me nauseous, Vinessa would write me e-mails like, “Girl, where are the pages?? I want to find out what happens!” She read PIECES OF US in many of its stages too, providing line edits and amazing feedback. And she reads my work-for-hire books too. The girl is all kinds of awesome. And, after she gets back from her fantastic (read: I’m so jealous) European vacation, we’re setting up a time to write together weekly. Hurrah!

I’ve been reading posts of others on the blog chain who talk about having many crit partners, and I don’t think I want to go there. I do have 2 or 3 Beta readers who are willing to read my stuff, and I feel the same way about theirs, but it seems these relationships are more on an as-needed basis and that’s fine with me. Sometimes, I get overwhelmed, and I would feel horrible not being able to keep up with everyone’s works. So, for now, I’ll stay with my two peeps above.

For more crit partner love, check out Tere’s post from yesterday, and then go to Shaun’s post (yes, THE Shaun I wrote about!) tomorrow.

He asks: “What are three books you would tell people that they need to keep reading even if they aren’t immediately sucked in by the first page?”

I think this is a great topic, but I’m having a lot of trouble with the question. When Shaun first posted, I looked at the blog chain schedule and breathed a sigh of relief because I had two-and-a-half weeks to think of answer. However, each day did not bring me closer to having one. The thing is, I’m THAT person–the one who just won’t give books a chance if I’m not drawn in immediately. I wasn’t always this way. I’d plug along, put a book down, but then pick it back up. I did give up sometimes, but not until I had read at least fifty pages. Then, four years ago, I had my son. And began revisions on my first book. Then did more revisions. Then continued to stay home with my son. And not sleep for two years (no joke–the first time my little guy slept 5 straight hours at night he was almost two). Then, my book sold and more revisions (which included cutting 20K words). And life kept going. When I had time to relax and read (usually on long car trips), I picked books that were a sure-win. Ones I knew I’d like. I made lists of authors whose styles I admired or those recommended by friends. Or even just silly, feel-good reads. And that’s when I noticed something. I’d read a page, two, three, and my eyes would glaze over. But…but…but…this is supposed to be a good book, I’d tell myself. Keep at it, girl. And I tried. I really tried. I made myself give the book ten pages. Sometimes, I’d be rewarded and the book would pick up at that point. More often than not, it wouldn’t. Somewhere, I lost the will to give the poor books a chance.

Honestly? I know it’s a problem. I know I’m missing out on tons of great books out there. But at this point in my life, it’s just how it is. Last week, I started teaching my first college class. The week before that, 3 Sunday school classes to middle and high-schoolers. All require prep and planning and innovative ideas so I don’t bore these poor students. And, I just finished working on a manuscript with a friend of mine, and starting copy edits on Pieces of Us. And I’m still a stay-at-home mom too. Other people with as much on their plates or more have it in them to befriend these books. To not judge them on their first encounters. I wish I could too, but one good thing that came out of this development is that the books I love and connect with, I REALLY love and connect with. They’re like the kinds of good friends that you’re not quite sure how you met, but you know you connected immediately. They’re those friends that make life simple, that you can just hang with and not have to impress. The books I enjoy from the start let me escape immediately, make me smile, and help destress. What more can you ask for in a good book?

Some of you probably DO want more, so if you’re the perseverant type when it comes to books, check out Tere’s post and then read through the rest of the chain for more recommended reads.

She says, “Since we are all writer’s, I thought it was about time for us to stretch our creative muscles and do a little writing. So, take the following topic and go crazy! Show us what you’ve got. Your story can be as long or as short as you choice.

The topic: A dark and stormy night.

And she also wants us to follow these rules:

1. Write for a minimum of 5 minutes… AND THEN KEEP GOING!
2. NO editing. (well.. do the obvious spelling and punctuation.. but nothing major)

OK, then. My piece is below. And I got a little confused and thought we had to start with “dark and stormy night” but oh well. When you’re done reading check out Shaun’s masterpiece from yesterday, and tune in tomorrow for Sarah’s post.

It was a dark and stormy night when Julia found out. She remembered because the lightning illuminated the window just as she read the text. She also remembered because the whole thing was a cliché: finding out bad news when it’s dark and stormy. Like the start of a bad ghost story. And forever, if she told anyone (not that she would), in her mind, whether she started the story that way or not, it would be on a dark and stormy night. She hated being a part of a cliché, hated that her family had turned into a cliché, and she hated finding out about her mom’s affair via erroneously sent text message. That, too, was lame and so two years ago. If her family had to fall apart, why couldn’t it be in a new, trend-setting way. Like maybe her mom could have fallen for a traveling trapeze artist or the guy who played the clown every Thursday at the Dunkin’ Donuts around the corner. That would have at least told her something. Like maybe her mom was zany and she needed something different. But what did it say when her mother’s affair was with an old high school boyfriend? A former bad boy turned accountant. It said her mother was the typical mid-life crisis example. A typical, dark and stormy night, cliché.

“There are so many things we have to include in our storyworlds…characters, world details, settings, etc. No matter what genre you write, your stories are full of tiny details that help create your storyworld. I know that for me, at least, finding or creating all these details can sometimes be a bit tough.”

One site I frequent is babynamesworld.com. I love it because it not only lists names but also the origins of the names and their meanings and it’s very user friendly. While there are some details I can use TK for, names I can’t. If I don’t have a good name, it’s very hard for me to get into the story. For example, I’m working on a new YA right now called LAST KISS. The girl MC’s name, Leila, came to me pretty quickly. The boy MC’s name, however, went through a few evolutions. Nothing seemed to click and it was hard to write the pages. (You could also call it procrastination but it was REALLY difficult for me to envision him without the right name). So I went to babynamesworld.com and found Connor, and it was PERFECT. I had a name and could picture his attitude, his face, everything. It’s kind of like when you meet someone and they then tell you their name, and it just DOES NOT match them. It’s like that for me when I get a feel for my characters. Some names match them and some don’t, but in the fiction world, I can keep choosing names until I get one I like. In the real world, we live with the names we’re given. Like my full name being Margaret, which I hate. Well, technically, it’s Margarita–which I really like–but it was changed to Margaret on all American records and I can write volumes on my theory that having the name Margaret is what prevented me from being popular in high school, but I’ll spare you. For today. Margie, on the other hand, is what I chose to be called when I was in college. And, let me tell you, those years were a BLAST. Coincidence? To me, Margie is fun and perky and you just can’t get mad at a Margie. The name just sounds too nice. Margaret, though? “Hey, do you know if Margaret is going to the party tonight?” “Nah, tonight is the night she puts her hair in a bun and watches Murder, She Wrote Reruns while sipping some herbal tea.”

Setting is another story. I don’t research much when it comes to landscapes because I usually pick areas I know and then put my own spin on them (I’m lazy like that). In PIECES OF US (my YA that will be out March 12, 2012), segments are set in the Catskills. I based that area on the bungalow colonies I went to with my grandparents when I was a kid–only in POU I made them lake houses because people were having trouble picturing what I meant. Other parts of the story, however, took place in Cherry Hill, NJ and Philadelphia, PA. Lucky for me, I have FB and posted a shout-out to people familiar with these areas. They told me about demographics, etc. and I also Googled a few streets in Philly to get a picture of where the teens hung out. Googling is my main MO. I don’t have specific websites I like (other than the names one). My first go-to is to ask someone, and after that it’s googling terms (like when I wrote a chapter book about cheerleading) or landmarks or phrases.

But what happens when you write within parameters of a different world? Coming up with worlds different from our own always fascinated me. Christine talks about this in her post. Check it out!

“Curses, you’ve been cursed! You can write no longer. The story well has run dry, and you can’t even remember how to type. Now what do you do? Where do you channel your creative energies? And to what lengths would you go to break the curse?”

Not remember how to type?? So that means no e-mail or communication?? Holy. I have to be honest, the e-mail and communicating part was what hit me first. This is a computer world. It’s how I make playdates, it’s how I discuss what’s on my mind, it’s how my friends vent. Not to mention it’s how I get in touch with editor and agent. Yes, they have phones, but my questions aren’t usually urgent so to call them with “Just checking that this is what you meant” would not be, uh, welcome.

It’s funny because the Internet did not really take off (with e-mailing, etc.) until I was a sophomore in college. So we all managed somehow before, right? But now? If I need to look up a fact, there’s no encyclopedia that’s updated to the minute. Words are at my fingertips at a moment’s request. Nope. Not being able to type would not do.

(My hubby, however, I think would be thrilled if I was cursed for a few days. Too much competition between him and my laptop. AND, he’s gotten tired of having me obsessively check mail every few minutes and agonize over my low Word Twist scores.)

On to the writing part. Here’s the deal. If EVERYONE was cursed and unable to write, I’d take it in stride. For a week or so. I can’t imagine never composing a story again or a poem or being incoherent in this way. Writing is my THING. Words are my THING. If you take that away, not sure what my strength would be. Certainly not math. I was going to stay I’d start recording my thoughts, but did that run dry too.

When I first read this topic, I thought, “Hmm…maybe having a break for a little would not be so bad.” But I didn’t realize you couldn’t even compose thoughts. I LOVE telling stories and making up stories and thinking about characters and telling my son bedtime stories. AND, he demands stories every time he goes on his swing too. So EVERYONE would suffer! Oh, and back to the everyone being cursed. If only I couldn’t write, but others could still produce volumes? Uh uh. I need an equal playing field.

But my competitive streak aside, I’d want my words. So what would I do? I don’t know. What are my options? How did this curse happen? What does the evil sorcerer want? As long as it didn’t involve people getting hurt, I’d be open to giving him/her whatever was wanted. My book dedicated to them? Done! Their names in bold letters on my acknowledgement page? Done! (I know I’m giving everything, huh?). Make me an offer, oh evil spirit!

I’ll tell you, though. Until I read this blog chain topic, I didn’t think how horrible writing block could be. And to read more tales of writing horror, check out Michelle’s post from yesterday and Abby’s post tomorrow.

There are SO many writing rules, but sometimes we have to break one or two, just to keep things interesting. Is there a writing rule you’ve broken on purpose? Why did you choose to break it? And if you want to post a snippet of your writing as an example, even better!

I’ve always been a play-by-the-rules kind of girl. That is, when I knew what the rules were. With writing, it seems that they’re changing daily. When I taught writing, I said to start with something that grabs attention or dialogue or out there fact. Recently, I heard not to start with dialogue? I can understand if it’s not attributed to anyone or if the dialogue is flat like:

“Hi,” I said as I passed John at his locker.

“Hi,” he said.

Yeah…that’s no way to start a story. I’ll even argue there’s no need to have this exchange in the book at all because it adds nothing. But dialogue in itself as a starter is not a problem for me. For example:

John’s dad cracked his knuckles and leaned in close, heart-to-heart style. “You know,” he said, slapping John on the knee. “The last time you looked this bothered was when Rover took a dump in your favorite hiking boots.”

If a book started like this, I’d be all over it. I’d want to know about the dad’s character, what’s bugging John, and why Rover takes dumps in people’s boots.

As for my writing, I just write. I don’t think about rules. I get a voice and go with it. Which means that the first draft has lots of problems. It may start slow. Not all the characters are as developed as they could be. There are holes in the plot. So maybe THAT’S a rule I break. Not outlining, not planning out the whole story, learning as I go. Yeah, let’s go with that.

To see more writing rebels, check out Eric’s post from yesterday and Shaun’s post tomorrow.

Be positive! Name some of the positive aspects of your writing — be it a compliment from a mentor, friend or crit partner to anything special you learned concerning your writing skills.

I have been in a funk for a while and taking stock of what I DO have in my life is the best treatment. I still love to write, still get excited at the prospect of a new story, still love the way new words feel in my head and on my lips, but it’s different than before publication. I never write just to write anymore. Everything I write is a potential novel or a means to get me there. And that’s OK. It doesn’t mean I like writing any less, just a fact of how things are. Some things, however, like bookstores don’t always hold the magic they once did. I can still walk into one and pop a squat, pull my son onto my lap and stay there for an hour or more just reading the oodles of books he wants. I love watching his face light up at the story, love that he can’t get enough stories, love watching what his almost 4 year old self gravitates to and how the possibility of me buying him a new book totally makes his day. In fact, if it wasn’t for him, I’d have forgotten that I once loved bookstores too. Before each trip to one consisted of me roaming the stacks trying to determine if the store carries INCONVENIENT. Before the answer to that could leave me happy happy or completely crestfallen.

So, you see, why I needed to do this chain. Here are the positives in my writing life.

1. Old friends: The first novel-writing class I took was at Mediabistro. I never published that novel (that was also started as my MA thesis) but  I met one of my really close friends there. She is one of my crit partners now and my books are what they are in large part to her. But she is more than that. She gets me and our similarities calm my head when I think I’m a total basketcase. She tells me I’m not because she thinks the same way. Maybe we’re both basketcases.

2. Older friends: Last weekend, my husband, son and I went to visit one of my oldest friends, his wife, and their 11 month old baby. D and I have known each other since we were 8 (when I first wrote a diary entry about how cute he looked when he did long division–a page he ripped into tiny pieces) and have been friends since we were 13. I invited him to my Bat-Mitzvah and our friendship was cemented. He and his wife have been so amazing and supportive in this writing journey. They’ve scoured stores in their area, talked to store managers about me signing books at the stores, ordered books so stores would have copies, and have been my special DC area cheer section. There’s something to be said about a friendship that’s lasted almost 22 years, and I’m lucky to have him and his family.

3. New friends: When I found out INC was going to be published, I joined The Tenners. And through them I met Shaun. He became my other crit partner and a fantastic friend. It was one of those things where we just completely clicked. We e-mail almost daily and Skype when we can. And it’s been forever for that but today we’re Skyping and I’ve been looking forward to it all day. I can write e-mails the size of a novella where I whine and vent and complain and he totally understands where I’m coming from. And this keeps me from going crazy and centers me in this unpredictable field.

4. Readers: Hooray for Books in Alexandria, VA, agreed to do INC for their teen book club, and they were phenomenal. A small group showed up for the discussion but those who did truly enjoyed the book and were able to relate to it and were touched by the characters. It is amazing to have a supportive group like that and for stores to give me a chance, to be willing to read this book and stock it. It means so much.

5. My writing skills: I feel I’m continuously learning what I can do and accomplish. I set one set of goals in my head and where I think a story may take me and it goes somewhere else. I’m proud of myself for going beyond in revisions, for plugging away even when it’s daunting. For not doing something half-way when that’s what’s easier, when that’s “good enough”. I don’t want to be “good enough.” I want to be everything I can.

As I said, I’m last on this chain and am not sure who went before me as I’m out of order. Everyone’s entries are uplifting so go back to Michelle’s and read all if you haven’t.

“What keeps you going (either trying to get an agent or to get published or finish that WIP that’s kicking your butt) when you know the odds are stacked way against you?”

I’m going to be honest. When I saw this topic, I groaned. Loudly. Not because it’s a bad topic but because I’m in one of those “This writing life is so so hard” kind of moods. I’ve answered this before and it’s interesting to me that this topic comes up often. I guess it’s because we all want to know how to keep going when the going gets tough. When it stays tough for a long time.

So since Laura asked this question almost 2 weeks ago, I’ve been thinking about it. I don’t have an answer. I just keep going. I feel there’s no other way. I don’t want to be that one book wonder person. I don’t want to fall off the face of the Earth when people barely know who I am, when I haven’t left a mark yet. There is so much more I want to accomplish with my writing–so many more books and genres I want to tackle. Quitting is not me–be it with writing or anything else. Plus, if I quit, I’ll never know if all my goal could have been achieved.

I think the odds are often stacked against us. But then that voice wonders why CAN’T it be ME? So I strive to make it happen. That in itself is hard because I can only control my writing, nothing else. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that.

So why do I keep going? Because I’m grown up now and this is what I always wanted to be. If I stop, what else am I going to be when I grow up? It was always this.

Check out Eric’s inspirational post from yesterday, and keep an eye out for the next blog chain.